Killer Routine by Alan Orloff

Author:Alan Orloff
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: soft-boiled, mystery, murder mystery, fiction, amateur sleuth, mystery novels, murder, amateur sleuth novel
Publisher: Llewellyn Worldwide, LTD.
Published: 2011-02-01T00:00:00+00:00

When I got to the club, eight employees sat in a large circle around a table: Donna, Skip, Ty, a couple of cooks, two servers, and a busboy. All eyes were on Artie, who stood with his back to me, talking and gesturing madly. It was another one of his famous pep talks, usually reserved for times when big name headliners were on the bill or when something of monumental import happened, like the time our beer supplier’s truck got stuck in the snow with our shipment aboard.

Everyone but Artie had seen me enter—I could tell by how each head followed me as I tried to tiptoe past on my way to the office. I’d almost made it when I heard Donna’s too-friendly voice rise above Artie’s. “Oh, yoo-hoo. Hello there, Channing. Come join the meeting, won’t you?”

Artie turned and spotted me, then waved me over while the others snickered in the background. They’d all try to sneak past, too, if they had the chance. Donna, especially. I trudged over to the group, duffel bag in hand. I made no move to sit.

“Hey. Just inspiring the troops,” Artie said. He stepped closer and whispered in my ear. “Getting them pumped up for our fight with Reed.”

I had better things to do than help foment the masses. “Yeah, well, I’ve got some stuff to go over. Skip can fill me in later.” I winked at Skip and he smiled, but most of the others looked bored stiff. Their glances shot daggers at me as I tried to extricate myself. Jealous, all.

Artie stroked his chin. “No, I think you should sit in. You might have something significant to add. This is a team effort and you are a big part of this team.” He held his hand up to the rest. “Right, team?”

Everyone chimed in affirmatively, sealing my fate. I guess if they had to sit through it, they were taking me down with them. Pulling up a chair, I noted the smug satisfaction in their faces. For the next fifteen minutes, Artie rambled on about how important it was to treat every customer like a king or queen, how vital it was to get every itsy-bitsy detail right, and how absolutely critical it was to make sure every single person—audience, talent, other employees—had a positive experience at The Last Laff. That’s the business we were in. Creating joy. And only by doing the best damn job we could would we be able to fend off the dark menace named Greedy Reed.

It was a moving pep talk and every one of us had heard it before. Ad infinitum.

I half expected Artie to end with a hip-hip-hooray cheer, but he sort of petered out, telling us to keep a smile on our faces and do our best. He adjourned the meeting, leaving everyone to drift off to his or her duties in preparation for the evening. I followed him back to the office.

He took his seat behind the desk and put his feet up.

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